it was a lazy sunday for me.. disappointed coz "in your eyes" came to its end already. I am so lazy to get up this morning but K says 'come on, go with us see the pool you're telling me weeks ago' ' let's go for a swim'
We went for an hour and a half for the ride to a place itself. We had all sorts of ridicules on the road. Duh!, honks, overtakes, bad stares, and almost hit a car, a batch of cars, people, and all sorts. the scary part was when we drove in a one-way street. its really scary.
but i think k got really hurt this time. LIke we lost confidence and gave her the scare and odd look of y are u on the wheel. We gave a chance, but its too DANGEROUS for K to be on the wheel.
I am jsut thankful we were guided and had a safe trip to and fro. got the scare out of me..
just thankful.. hope K understands..
ideas, just wondering what its all about, figuring out the daily experiences. read on the new things i learn
Sunday, November 28, 2004
Sunday, November 14, 2004
collections of thoughts
Celebrate!
Just right on the first minute of my day, I am already thankful and just am elated with the way I am now.
So far, It is the best one i ever had. I never had this feeling that I really enjoyed my day and had this overwhelming feeling.
I had this big love on me, actually I am surprised on how I am right now.
I can't ask for anything more:
I love the family just as we are now ( we try to understand each other).
I saw through the remaining friends how real they are , and I love them as they are, coz they show who they really are.
They open up to let me see who they really are. I am thankful for that.
Career wise, I realize I work with the mission not the money it wont matter.
I don't even dare to ask the higher being to get us richer or what. We live comfortably, we eat what we want, we sleep on a mattress, everyone is in the house, love and the family fills up the house.
Yes we dont get to live luxuriuosly , but this is OK for me. Just getting us going and survive through the years is all i ask.
I see for the simple things in life. It is what I always dreamed of. Family, friends who are real and we accept them as they are, love to keep us going, a simple life and a good night sleep.
I never thought I have this love in me for the longest time. when the moment comes, my heart still pounds, a smile is again in my face and just as everything is like into place.
I am just so thankful.
========
See ya soon !
I was thinking the other day, should i give the effort or not. But my heart says love is never selfish. You just want to be there for the person. Even you are not the one expected.
I know I don't stand any chance. I just did what i felt like right and what my heart says.
The person might not get it or see it, but in my heart I know I did what I felt for the person. To be There.
I am admittedly exerting extraordinary effort, but i dont mind. It's my heart speaking.
I didnt see you off, I might just cry and I am bad at farewells. I know we'll see each other soon. I don't know when but we will cross path.
Even if you will just be on the other side of the world, I am just lucky to have known such a good person.
I might not fly and go see you but definitely you are treasured. You are very rare, the fun, the wit, the humor, the heart you have.. you are simply loveable.
==========
My sunday!
At 830 am I am up again just simply enjoying the joys of life and feels sooooo HAPPY.
I watched Walk to Remember. And my sister was just saying do I still feel something for the movie?
I used to cry a lot on this movie the first time I saw it, it really touched me. Its so pure love and innocent and unconditional. Wouldn't our world be a better one when every love is this way.
I hope everybody has that even once in their lifetime. I am not a Mandy fan and she is ineffective as an actress for me.
But Shane West did made me cry all over again.
My friends, my family greeted me. They did not forget.
=========
the homeless
Everytime I go out I had this feeling of guilt? sympathy? I don't know which one. But poverty has really been a problem here.
Every one has a hard time surviving , resulting to finding ways which are not right just to make ends meet.
But i thought , was it because our country is just poor? or are we just undisciplined to keep our priorities straight.
The social pressure is really stressful, that's why some pretends to be well while indeed everything is not in shape.
Last wednesday, I walked along lawton to take the next trip on the way to the office. And man! the homeless are not in a number of 10 but they are a minimum of 50 persons.
Years before, the homeless can be counted and they struggle. But now its like they gave up and just want to ask for the sky to let them survive.
It makes me sad.
At the streets, a family actually lives on the pavement in the middle of lanes where the signal light stands. With their 3 kids making the 3 lane road as their playground.
I am hoping for a future for the country. We want to survive and rise up again. We are hopeful that we can be disciplined and wake up in the reality to just work things out together.
=========
Breakups
other than the homeless, my day.
I had friends who are on the verge of breakups. Some of the decisions are make or break, its because on our age, we are not playing games.
We are serious in relationships, tending to weigh things up right now, if it is indeed working out or not. For highschool, you might not pay attention to it.Coz there are still lots of chance when we get to college or just simply having fun for the summer.
But now its different.
I am not the best person to ask on the heart matters. I dont even know if I ever felt the love. I know i loved someone. but loving you back might be a different one. coz there are two individuals trying to understand and complement each other.
I hope we think for the best for I just hope the best for them.
What a week that was.
Just right on the first minute of my day, I am already thankful and just am elated with the way I am now.
So far, It is the best one i ever had. I never had this feeling that I really enjoyed my day and had this overwhelming feeling.
I had this big love on me, actually I am surprised on how I am right now.
I can't ask for anything more:
I love the family just as we are now ( we try to understand each other).
I saw through the remaining friends how real they are , and I love them as they are, coz they show who they really are.
They open up to let me see who they really are. I am thankful for that.
Career wise, I realize I work with the mission not the money it wont matter.
I don't even dare to ask the higher being to get us richer or what. We live comfortably, we eat what we want, we sleep on a mattress, everyone is in the house, love and the family fills up the house.
Yes we dont get to live luxuriuosly , but this is OK for me. Just getting us going and survive through the years is all i ask.
I see for the simple things in life. It is what I always dreamed of. Family, friends who are real and we accept them as they are, love to keep us going, a simple life and a good night sleep.
I never thought I have this love in me for the longest time. when the moment comes, my heart still pounds, a smile is again in my face and just as everything is like into place.
I am just so thankful.
========
See ya soon !
I was thinking the other day, should i give the effort or not. But my heart says love is never selfish. You just want to be there for the person. Even you are not the one expected.
I know I don't stand any chance. I just did what i felt like right and what my heart says.
The person might not get it or see it, but in my heart I know I did what I felt for the person. To be There.
I am admittedly exerting extraordinary effort, but i dont mind. It's my heart speaking.
I didnt see you off, I might just cry and I am bad at farewells. I know we'll see each other soon. I don't know when but we will cross path.
Even if you will just be on the other side of the world, I am just lucky to have known such a good person.
I might not fly and go see you but definitely you are treasured. You are very rare, the fun, the wit, the humor, the heart you have.. you are simply loveable.
==========
My sunday!
At 830 am I am up again just simply enjoying the joys of life and feels sooooo HAPPY.
I watched Walk to Remember. And my sister was just saying do I still feel something for the movie?
I used to cry a lot on this movie the first time I saw it, it really touched me. Its so pure love and innocent and unconditional. Wouldn't our world be a better one when every love is this way.
I hope everybody has that even once in their lifetime. I am not a Mandy fan and she is ineffective as an actress for me.
But Shane West did made me cry all over again.
My friends, my family greeted me. They did not forget.
=========
the homeless
Everytime I go out I had this feeling of guilt? sympathy? I don't know which one. But poverty has really been a problem here.
Every one has a hard time surviving , resulting to finding ways which are not right just to make ends meet.
But i thought , was it because our country is just poor? or are we just undisciplined to keep our priorities straight.
The social pressure is really stressful, that's why some pretends to be well while indeed everything is not in shape.
Last wednesday, I walked along lawton to take the next trip on the way to the office. And man! the homeless are not in a number of 10 but they are a minimum of 50 persons.
Years before, the homeless can be counted and they struggle. But now its like they gave up and just want to ask for the sky to let them survive.
It makes me sad.
At the streets, a family actually lives on the pavement in the middle of lanes where the signal light stands. With their 3 kids making the 3 lane road as their playground.
I am hoping for a future for the country. We want to survive and rise up again. We are hopeful that we can be disciplined and wake up in the reality to just work things out together.
=========
Breakups
other than the homeless, my day.
I had friends who are on the verge of breakups. Some of the decisions are make or break, its because on our age, we are not playing games.
We are serious in relationships, tending to weigh things up right now, if it is indeed working out or not. For highschool, you might not pay attention to it.Coz there are still lots of chance when we get to college or just simply having fun for the summer.
But now its different.
I am not the best person to ask on the heart matters. I dont even know if I ever felt the love. I know i loved someone. but loving you back might be a different one. coz there are two individuals trying to understand and complement each other.
I hope we think for the best for I just hope the best for them.
What a week that was.
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
life decisions
I am again haunted by this decision.
For now.. i decided to take my china trip on the backseat first. I will just be too broke when i get back. Maybe with the right time.. it will just come to me eventually.
But now, i really want to teach. A teacher assistant post. its great.. but i dont like the way mum talks me out of it.. to stay on the boring side of life.. while my mission ( i am still not sure if it really is my mission), is being put on hold.. maybe temporarily or indefinitely.
But I have this soft spot for the school system, love to learn. I am just afraid to make a wrong decision, a wrong turn, but for once in my life i would like to try it.... i'm being summoned, i am really for it, but something is holding me bck i dunno...
hoping for enlightenment on this crossroad.
For now.. i decided to take my china trip on the backseat first. I will just be too broke when i get back. Maybe with the right time.. it will just come to me eventually.
But now, i really want to teach. A teacher assistant post. its great.. but i dont like the way mum talks me out of it.. to stay on the boring side of life.. while my mission ( i am still not sure if it really is my mission), is being put on hold.. maybe temporarily or indefinitely.
But I have this soft spot for the school system, love to learn. I am just afraid to make a wrong decision, a wrong turn, but for once in my life i would like to try it.... i'm being summoned, i am really for it, but something is holding me bck i dunno...
hoping for enlightenment on this crossroad.
all i want is...
I want to....
.... take taekwondo classes - i just love the white robe
.... learn belly dancing or flamenco
.... make desserts and be guilt free after having them
.... swim on a nice , quiet pool - i found one.. gonna go see the pool i hope it is
.... learn and speak Hanggul & French
.... speak fluent Mandarin
.... see , immerse and get involved in a culture
.... do volunteer work
.... teach ( but im afraid if it is really my path) am just so afraid it's not my calling , but there's no turning back
.... see places
.... be brave when i fall in love
.... meditate and attain inner peace
lastly... to SURVIVE test of time, and be resilient as always.
To have strong faith, and do good deeds, think good thoughts and speak good words. Enjoy life as it is.
.... take taekwondo classes - i just love the white robe
.... learn belly dancing or flamenco
.... make desserts and be guilt free after having them
.... swim on a nice , quiet pool - i found one.. gonna go see the pool i hope it is
.... learn and speak Hanggul & French
.... speak fluent Mandarin
.... see , immerse and get involved in a culture
.... do volunteer work
.... teach ( but im afraid if it is really my path) am just so afraid it's not my calling , but there's no turning back
.... see places
.... be brave when i fall in love
.... meditate and attain inner peace
lastly... to SURVIVE test of time, and be resilient as always.
To have strong faith, and do good deeds, think good thoughts and speak good words. Enjoy life as it is.
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